Growing
up, my mother emphasized being able to communicate. She encouraged me to speak during class, and
to take great pride in my ability to write. If you review the annals of history, you will
find some of the most impactful figures were great communicators. That is not a coincidence. Nowadays, however, it seems that we, as a
society, have lost the reverence for effective communication skills. People seem to be in too much of a hurry to
effectively communicate. This failure to communicate, or lack of ability to do
so, has been manifested in many ways.
I
do not know if it is just me, but it seems that more and more people are
socially awkward. I am talking about
standing by the punch bowl all night during a party socially awkward. People truly have moved away from holding
meaningful conversations. I have also
noticed that people do not take the time to effectively communicate in written
form, either. When I was coming of age, short-hand
communication was used sparingly.
Nowadays, it feels that “lol,” and other short-hand abbreviations have
truly become the norm. How can we get
back to the basics?
This
past weekend, as I sat at a pool, I looked around and noticed people sitting in
groups, but not engaging with each other at all. I even noticed couples who were not engaging with
each other. Instead, they were too busy
scrolling their Facebook, or Instagram timelines, or taking selfies. How did we get here? Is this inability to communicate contributing
to failed relationships?
Growing
up, you had to engage in conversations with people because social media did not
exist. If you gathered the nerve to
approach a young lady, you had to think about: (1) what you would say to her,
and (2) how you would eventually get around to asking for her telephone, or
beeper number. Not only did you have
that stress, but you also had to consider what you would say to her on the
telephone if and when you received her number.
This was stressful, but we did it.
The kids these days will never know the stress we dealt with! Now, they can send a text message, or a
direct message on Instagram. These
applications—while very convenient—contribute to a generation of bad communicators.
Surprisingly,
the inability to communicate has spilled over to the professional world as
well. In my line of work, I often attend
professional networking events, or conferences where people are actively
searching for viable business connections.
Too often what I see is people who literally do not know how to start a
conversation, or people who cannot hold a conversation. If I were a betting man, I would bet money
that people have missed golden business opportunities because they could not
hold a conversation. This is pretty sad
and very unfortunate. This is also the
reality in many places.
I
have also noticed that many people cannot effectively communicate in written
form, or are in too big of a hurry to do so.
Either way, it is pretty frustrating.
I have always enjoyed reading good prose. I respect writers who tell a story or analyze
a complex topic in a very simple written form.
Although I realize that not everyone is a trained writer, it can be exasperating
to talk to someone who abbreviates every word.
At times, it is appropriate to type “lol” or “smh.” However, defaulting to this kind of
communicating can be very misleading.
I
have seen statuses on Facebook and other social media platforms that are so poorly
written that you literally are confused as to what message the person was trying
to relay. When I read some of these
statuses, I immediately think about my elementary school teachers who made
students diagram sentences. I wonder if
students are still required to do so? Either
way, grammatically incorrect statuses, have seemingly become the rule—not the
exception. Maybe they do not care because the President is a terrible communicator. If he is the leader of the free world and does not care about communication, why should they? I digress.
Bad
writing has even permeated the professional world. Too many times, I have received emails from business
professionals that are riddled with grammatical errors. In the professional world, people often will
judge you by the written product you present to them. In many cases, they have never met you in
person, so their first impression of you is the email you send to them. Some
professionals are more likely to forgive grammatical errors. Others, on the other hand, will completely
write a person off for failure to proofread an email. I believe in setting the tone early in a personal
or business relationship. That said, I definitely
believe in taking an appropriate amount of time to proofread documents.
Maybe
I am old school in my thinking, but I hope our society places more of an
emphasis on effective communication as we move forward.
Peace